Reading Time: 7 minutesIs there anything so humbling as learning another language? Is anything so good at obliterating your dear ego? To speak another language, you have to release the fear of sounding like a fool because you will sound like a fool. You must make peace with the noise of the cave(wo)man stereotype jaggedly forcing its way out of your mouth, throwing elbows against your tongue and teeth, before you can sound melodious and cool. Just as any beginning …
Author: Caitlan
→Copywriter in the streets, creative writer in the sheets. This blog is my tacky, white trash roots tell-all. I live in Costa Rica, so you'll have to hear about brunch with iguanas and pending volcanic doom, too. What else? I try new jobs and projects on as if they were sunglasses at Target. Read about my unconventional life, my dudes.
Reading Time: 4 minutesThis is my homage to T.S. Eliot’s poem, “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock“. If you have not read “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock“, leave this post and go do that. If you have read it, I hope you enjoy my version of it. I am not claiming to be original, here. The structure, rhythm, desperation, and any beauty at all are Eliot’s. Most of the words, the shift in desire, and the modern …
Reading Time: 11 minutes*names, numbers, and locations have been changed to protect the privacy of fascinating people. One time, I pitched my writing in exchange for lodging, like some kind of influencer freak, and I almost wound up on an episode of When Animals Attack. — One mundane day in my pandemic bubble in Costa Rica in 2020—as the world outside burned down around me—I was scrolling mindlessly through Instagram, looking for life in all the wrong places. I ‘remembered’ …
Reading Time: 4 minutesI love parties. I love hosting. I hate party planning. I’ve been trying this new thing for the last few years where I try to be a good person. Unfortunately, that means thinking of others and being generous. I agree those are good things and wish I naturally had those traits. But no one ever taught me, so I have to make a conscious effort to remember to consider others and practice generosity. My mom is a …
Reading Time: 8 minutesScott City High School Class of ‘07 was a graduating class of about 60 people. There had been more of us starting out. But naturally, some decided to uphold the long-held family tradition of dropping out. I blame the local radio station that could never let go of the 70s. Twenty-eight years after its release, Pink Floyd’s ‘Another Brick in the Wall’ just rang too hot in my colleagues’ ears. Scott City High School would have been …
Reading Time: 5 minutesIn archaeologists, you will find an under-appreciated group of interesting dirtbags. I walked among them for a while, parading as one myself. In my first semester of college, I fell in with the anthropology group, the gateway major that led to harder, more addictive fields like linguistics and archaeology. Whatever you do, for the love of God, if you want to save yourself complete and total humiliation when graced with the presence of an archaeologist, do not …
Reading Time: 6 minutes“You remember when I had to catch the school bus in the rain, so Ma put bread bags over my shoes and made me wear a trash bag like a poncho,” my cousin asked. I laughed and turned back to where my grandmother lay in her coffin. Ma died three weeks ago. Here we sat, at the funeral home, waiting for the pastor to begin the eulogy we had written. A couple of nights before the funeral, …
Reading Time: 6 minutesThe bell rang to dismiss our 5th-period English Lit III class. “Caitlan, Olivia, Emma, and Noah. Can you stay for a moment, please?”, Mrs. Murphy asked. That was weird. Olivia, Emma, and Noah were my smart friend group. We were the model UN and debate team nerds. We were taking college credit trig together. I ran a tight ship managing my double life. I drew a wide dividing line between academics and parties/poor decisions. Or at least …
Reading Time: 6 minutesWhen I turned 16, I started working at a 1950s-themed diner off Interstate 55. One night, there was nothing I wanted more than to run away with a total stranger. People (by which I mean old people) enjoy 1950s-themed diners because they like to romanticize the 50s as a purer time when life was simpler. As if it were all jukeboxes, poodle skirts, and milkshakes. But have you ever listened to the lyrics of “Sixteen Candles”? It’s …
Reading Time: 6 minutesMy Uncle Moe. God rest his soul. He died in November 2019 when he left his lane and hit a semi head-on. He had to have emergency surgery and his lungs couldn’t take the anesthesia. He had emphysema from a lifetime of smoking. We always assumed he’d die young but we expected it would be from blowing the house up from smoking while on oxygen. Have you ever hung out with anyone smoking while on oxygen? No? …
